Author: Amy

Simple

Posted on by Amy
This weekend I’m enjoying simple things.  Lilacs in mason jars on my counter and table.  Big smiles and hugs from my girls.  Playing outside in amazing, warm weather.  Watching imaginations bloom and sister games develop.  Great times with wonderful friends.  Date night.  Some lovely real snail mail notes from my Grandma and a sister in law.  We’re not doing anything extravagant or big this weekend, but doing simple things together is exactly what makes me happy right now.

Miss has had some trouble with a bit of eczema.  We discovered it was probably largely being caused by her frequent wearing of her “ballerina costume.”  So I have had to tell her she can no longer wear it and explain why.  I was worried this might lead to an all out screaming fit.  But to her credit, Miss has taken this in stride and is now just working on expanding her dress up repertoire.  At a play date on Friday she was a doctor.  Yesterday, she was a princess.  She had been wearing high-heeled play shoes and carrying a Snow White purse in addition to her tutu and crown, but in preparation to go outside to play, we discussed every princess’s need for real shoes and sunglasses.  She chose boots.  It’s a good look.

I believe this stick was supposed to be some sort of weapon for fending off the “Evil Queen,” her sister.

The weapon of the Evil Queen?  A watering can.

Miss chose this rock as her place from which to defend herself.
“Here she comes!!!”
Terrifying, eh?

The battle.

It was epic, of course.  Miss alternates between enlisting her sister in the roles of “Monster,” “Evil Queen,” and “Prince Charming.”  Lass plays along happily.  It’s so fun to watch.

Last night I think my husband and I finally reached real “grown up” status.  We had a grown up night and play date in one.  It was awesome.  Our friends came over with their three kids, my husband cooked ribs, the kids played, no one got hurt or threw a tantrum, my friend and I chased kids around and had a some great grown up conversation (as only moms can do while managing five kids running and climbing all over and one newborn), and our husbands consumed a couple of grown up beverages while talking about manly things and occasionally bouncing a baby.  Good food and good company led to a supremely enjoyable evening.

The four oldest kids all crammed into our tiny sandbox.  This thing was the entertainment hit of the evening.  They all played in there, even dumping sand over each others’ heads, and never once was there an argument amongst them.

It was beautiful.

This little munchkin was the star of the show.  She loves to be outside, and she rocked the bouncy seat when she wasn’t eating or napping in her swing inside.  A good time was had by all.

Today we’re having a lazy Sunday at home.  The big girls are outside playing with their daddy.  Our garden is starting to produce a few items ready to be eaten (radishes and lettuce).  We have lots of leftovers from dinner last night, so I won’t have to cook.  This is the life.  Happy weekend to you.

An Anniversary Post

Posted on by Amy

I had a date night with my hubby tonight for our anniversary, which was yesterday, but he has been working nights this week and just finished up this morning.  So, date night tonight.  It was fabulous.  First night out since Sis’s arrival BTW, and all went perfectly (I will never again underestimate the beauty of having a baby who will drink from a bottle).  Four years of wedded bliss with my BFF, my soul mate, the man of my dreams…  It’s late and I have had a glass of wine, so I don’t really have it in me to do an original anniversary post tonight.  But I like the one from last year.  It sums up my feelings for my hubby nicely, so here you go.  Good night!
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Three years ago today, I married the man of my dreams. I know. Saying “the man of my dreams” is totally cliche. However, I think the reason many phrases become cliche is that they are so true. My husband really is the man of my dreams. Before I met him, if I thought of the kind of person I wanted to, or dreamed of, spending my life with, I would have described him. Handsome. Intelligent. Funny. Considerate. Hard-working. Sans piercings… You name it. If I once wished for a quality in a potential mate, he has it. And then some.

Another way I could describe my husband is to say that he is my soul mate. All right. Another cliche. But it’s true! The man could have been created especially for me. He gets me. We’re a great team. He completes me. Oops! There’s another one 🙂

Okay, how about this? My hubby is my best friend. My BFF. Cliche? Maybe. But also true. I would rather spend time with him than anyone else. I love to spend time chatting with him about all sorts of things. I also just love to be in the same room with him even if we’re not talking. He could be working on his computer and I might be reading, and I will always choose to read my book in the same room as him just to be near him.
He is the person I look forward to waking up with every morning. He is my partner in all things. He makes me laugh. He does the dishes while I put the girls to bed. He encourages me to pursue my interests, like book clubs and cooking classes. He lets me know in many ways how much he appreciates me. He does fun things with me like our “Chopped” at home adventure. We share the same values. He loves me and respects me and takes care of me. He is a wonderful dad to our girls.
Here’s to three years of wedded bliss, harmonious matrimony, living real life every day with the man of my dreams. My soul mate. My best friend. My husband is all these things. Truly. Cliche or not. He floats my boat. Lights my fire. Trips my trigger. Yep. I love him.

Lessons on Bargain Shopping

Posted on by Amy
Yard sale season is upon us.  Oh, how I love yard sales (or rummage sales as they’re called around here).  I used to wake up early nearly every Saturday in graduate school with my sales already marked on my laminated city map and cruise around Louisville finding treasures galore.  I furnished my first apartment almost exclusively with yard sale finds.  It makes me almost giddy just thinking about it.
Since having kids I haven’t gone yard-sale-ing as much.  Mostly because I just don’t relish the idea of driving around town, finding a sale, getting the kids out for a quick look, strapping them back into their car seats, and repeating this over and over. Because of course many yard sales only warrant a quick glance and on to the next.  Not fun when you have to drive to get from one to the next with three small children.  
This weekend there was a big annual neighborhood sale that I have been wanting to go to.  I am all about being able to park the car once and walk to lots of sales in a short distance.  I have heard good things about this particular neighborhood sale.  I have been itching to go to it so much that I actually considered trying to get up extra early and hit the sales before going to our play date yesterday morning, knowing that all the best stuff would probably be gone by today.  I quickly discarded that idea as completely insane, but I couldn’t help but feel all antsy about getting to the sales this morning.  When we did get there late this morning, it was wonderful.  Big girls in the wagon, Baby Sis in my wrap, and we were all set to shop.  

It was awesome.

I love finding bargains.  But I think this time I loved teaching Miss and Lass what a “bargain” is even more than the bargains themselves.  We found one sale where they had lots of Little Mermaid books.  Very nice hardcover books that were like new (Miss is holding one in the photo below) for 50 cents each.  I grabbed up the books, gave each girl a dollar, and told them they could each pick two books.  The lady running the sale said, “They can have three for a dollar.”  Naturally, I said, “What a bargain!” and proceeded to try to explain to Miss why this was so.  She wasn’t really listening, because she was carefully going through each of the books to choose her three (which she has been “reading” nonstop and she is sleeping with tonight, BTW), but I was excited to tell her anyway.  I loved watching her select her books, take them to the lady with her dollar and shyly give her the money with a quiet, “Thank you” and a little sideways grin.

Later on I happened to find myself at a sale being run by two ladies in my book club.  They commented on how quietly and peacefully my girls were riding in their wagon.  Thank you Little Mermaid books.

One of my friends was selling Candy Land and Memory games, in great condition, for 50 cents each.  Score.

Miss and I played a game tonight before bed.  She kicked my butt.

I’m looking forward to many years of bargain shopping with my girls.  Next lesson?  I’m teaching them how to haggle…

La La La

Posted on by Amy
A few weeks ago I posted this entry about how much we all love to sing at our house, and included a video of Miss singing “Whistle While You Work.”  I still watch that video from time to time because it makes me chuckle.  
I mentioned in that post that Lass also loves to sing, though of course she can’t quite do all the words to the songs like Miss can yet.  Tonight my husband captured Lass singing on video.  One of Miss’s favorite songs to sing, besides “Whistle While You Work” is the theme from the new Care Bears movies.  She sings it loud and proud, “We are Care Bears, La La La-la-la!”  She sings this so often that Lass’s original word for “Care Bears” was “La-la.”  Now Lass can sing the La-la song herself.  Check it out.

Have a great weekend.  La La La.

Things I Loved This Week

Posted on by Amy
I lost my camera cord for uploading photos for a few days.  I found it yesterday and uploaded a ton of fun photos from the past week.  So here’s a big post of some things I’ve been loving this week, chock full of lots of pics. 
I’m loving new fashion statements.
My Auntie sent a package last week with some things for all of the girls.  My big girls had a field day with these headbands and balloons.  I love that they put the headbands on like little hippies.

When I was little, I was very into dressing up.  I used to have a field day at my Grandma’s house because she would let me play in her jewelry box, which was full of tons of necklaces and clip on earrings.  My Mom’s jewelry box, on the other hand, was sadly lacking fun dress up items, as was her closet.  I think she owned one pair of high heels.  They were silver, from my Auntie’s wedding, I think. I loved that one pair of beautiful shoes.  My Mom just wasn’t really a shoe gal.  Or a purse gal.  Or a clothes gal.  Therefore, my dress up options when I played in her closet were nearly nonexistent.  My girls will not have the same problem.  They get into my closet and have a field day with all sorts of heels and purses.

They have a box of their own things in their play room too.  Shoes have been big this week.

I’m loving sister bonding.

These two have really gotten into wrestling in the past few days.

But they’re always super sweet and gentle with Baby Sis.

I’m loving watching this one.

I’m loving conversations with my girls.

My two big girls are so chatty and have so much to say.  Lass’s language is really exploding and she is starting to speak in sentences.  She can say just about anything, though sometimes it’s hard to understand her at first.  She makes me smile and often laugh with the little things she says. She loves to play “Shark” right now, and so she tends to yell the word any time she’s in the mood to play, which is quite often.  It makes me giggle that her pronunciation of the word is “Shart.”  Yep.  Full volume.  All the time.  It cracks me up.

I also love listening to my girls talk to each other.  They have real conversations now.  Miss understands Lass nearly as well as I do, so they talk about all sorts of stuff.  I love that Miss calls her “Honey” a lot and likes to try to teach her new things and tell her what to do.  She’s trying to help her learn ABCs and counting.  It’s adorable to watch and listen to them.

Life is so good.

Reload

Posted on by Amy

As I’m adjusting to life as a mommy of three, I am finding I have not been blogging as much as I’d like. I intend to get better about this.  But in the meantime, I might “reload” a old favorite post here and there just to keep from going too long without posting.  Here’s an oldie but a goodie from the first days of Miss’s potty training.  I still cringe a bit when I read this one…
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When I started as a prison psychologist, I had to go to the same two-week training that the federal government makes all correctional workers go through. Among other things, I learned self defense, spent a lot of time on the firing range, had physical fitness tests, and learned lots about how to prevent and handle a “major disturbance,” which is prison staff lingo for a riot. I remember one instructor saying something like, “We have the control in our institutions because the inmates let us have control. There are way more of them than us, and they could take control at any time. We will always get it back, but don’t forget that they could take it.” I heard this idea several times in various trainings I went to over the years. I think the purpose of saying this was to stress to us that our control was fragile and we needed to exert it with respect, lest our residents decide they weren’t gonna take it anymore.
Fast forward seven-ish years to a day in the life of me, The Mom, the one with the “control,” and Miss, The Toddler, the one who generally goes along and lets me have control because life flows better that way. The one who decided yesterday that she wasn’t gonna take it anymore and went into all out riot mode. Yes folks. My 2’7″, 26-pound 2 year old brought me to my knees yesterday.
Remember my post from the other day when I said potty training was going so well? Remember how I said I firmly believe you can’t force a child to go to the bathroom? Well. My daughter firmly proved me right yesterday. And I never even tried to force her to go to the bathroom. I just tried to get her to not go on the floor. Or on her little chair in her room. Or on the couch. Yesterday was not my best day as Mommy, and Miss decided to seize control of things by controlling what she could – her bladder. Yes, potty training worked very well. Miss does know when she has to go and she is able to tell me. She had been doing this very well all week. One thing she had not been doing at all was napping. So after five days without a nap, we were both tired and a bit frayed. She had an accident yesterday because she did not tell me she had to go. Throughout the entire training process up to that point I had been super positive and upbeat, even with accidents. “Next time just make sure you tell Mommy when you have to go so we can keep those underwear dry, okay?” Well, yesterday I had a not-so-wonderful Mommy Moment and I scolded her for her accident. Nothing too awful, but I definitely used a stern voice and told her that she was supposed to tell me when she had to go and not pee-pee on the floor. I think I gave an exasperated sigh or two. I did manage to regroup fairly quickly and then in my more upbeat voice repeat the usual reminder to tell me when she has to go the next time. But apparently she was not all that forgiving of my moment of testiness. From that point forward, she was in control and letting me know it. She refused to go to the bathroom when I took her in to let her try. I never pushed the issue, but did try to get her to go a few times in an attempt to stop the madness that had begun. She wouldn’t even sit when I’d take her into the bathroom, but then would go moments later in a less favorable spot. She wasn’t giving an inch. Suffice it to say, she had many accidents throughout the afternoon. I was trying so hard not to get into a power struggle with her, which was ironic, given that I had absolutely no power with this issue at all.



Things did improve somewhat right before bed, but by that time I was a wreck. I was berating myself for being the most horrible mother ever, and thinking I had ruined all the hard work we had done on the potty training by scolding her and that I had perhaps scarred her for life as all sorts of Freudian theories came to mind. And yes, this is a bit of an exaggeration, but not much. Just ask my mom, who I called near tears while chugging a glass of wine within minutes of putting Miss to bed. Or my husband who wasn’t able to get home until late last night and came in to find me grumpy and tearful and asking him to go get me ice cream (he did).
Of course, at the end of the day, when your toddler takes you down, you just have to get back up. By the time I went to bed, with the help of my husband, my mom, some wine, and some ice cream, I was feeling much better. I went to bed hopeful that yesterday would just be a bump in the road and that today would be a huge improvement. And of course it was. Miss had only one accident. She was happy to go on her potty and glowed at the praise she received. I was going to leave her with our babysitter so I could go grocery shopping this afternoon. I desperately needed to get some groceries and had wanted to go yesterday after her non-nap, but she refused to go to the bathroom, and I wasn’t willing to take her out in public with a full bladder with the way things were going yesterday. So today I thought I’d just avoid any problems and let her stay with our babysitter, whom she loves. But as I was getting ready to go she said, “I want to go store too. Pwease Mommy. I not get my pants all wet.” Well, that just melted my heart and so of course I let her come along. We had a great time. And when we got back, wonder of wonders, Miss finally took a nap! Oh halle-freaking-lujiah!!! All the world looks so much brighter on this side of a nap.



There are days when being a Mom just kicks the crap out of you. I really believe that there isn’t any more important job. Therefore, when things don’t go right, when I screw up, my feelings of inadequacy and guilt are greatly magnified. I question myself and feel like a failure. No one can make a mother of a two-year-old feel more impotent than that two-year-old. But amazingly, even when she is being a stinker and I’m at the end of my rope, the girl is sweet and loving and brightens my world. Just when I feel like I want to go crawl under my covers and stay there, she will say something like this comment from yesterday, “Lass so sweet, Lass so cute,” and then when I ask her if she’s cute say, “No, I not cute. I pwetty.” My girls make me laugh. They make me smile. They make my heart swell until it feels like it’s going to burst. Sometimes they make me want to pull my hair out. Always they make me want to be a better Mom. Even yesterday. Hell, especially yesterday! I’m not perfect, and sometimes I totally suck at this Mom thing, but in the words of that instructor, I “always get it back.” I guess that’s just what moms do. We do our best for our kids and sometimes we totally lose it. But we always get it back. 
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I hope to be back soon with a fresh post and some new photos!

A Little Daddy Time

Posted on by Amy
I have written many times about how much my older girls love their time with their Daddy.  When he comes home from work, they shriek and run to him.  As soon as dinner is over they’re begging him to play “monster” with them or read to them or dance with them.  They are definitely Daddy’s girls.  
Baby Sis is following right in their footsteps.

Every night she has a little special time with her Daddy and seems to enjoy it thoroughly.

Daddy’s Girl.

What Do I Do All Day Anyway?

Posted on by Amy
If you aren’t or have never been a stay-at-home mom (or dad), you might wonder what someone does who stays home with her kids all day.  I know I did before becoming a full-time mom myself.  I didn’t wonder about this in a malicious way, in a “what the H-E-double-hockey-stick-does-she-do-all-day?” kind of way.  I just wondered.
Well.  Now I know.  So, what do I do all day?  Here’s an idea:
I create mountains with couch cushions.  I encourage.  I insist “you can do it.”  I cheer for accomplishments.  I help when necessary.
I do laundry.
 
 

I have tea parties.  I color.  I read aloud.

I ask, “What color is this?”  “What does (fill in this blank with some animal) say?” “What sound does (fill in this blank with some letter) make?” “What do you think about that?”  All. day. long.

I sing songs.  I sound out words.  I count everything out loud.

I answer “Why?”  and “Why?” and “Why?”

I watch.  I praise.  I watch again.  And again.  And again.  I teach.  I spot.

I kiss boo boos.  I teach manners.  And responsibility.  And problem solving.  And everything.

I discourage whining.  I try to reinforce more effective ways of communicating.  I try to teach my girls to be strong and direct.

I do laundry.

I referee fights over who gets to wear which headband.  Over who gets the little Cinderella doll (or “Wedda” as Lass calls her).  Over who gets to hold Baby Sis first.

I change diapers.  I wash diapers.  I fold diapers.

I nurse a newborn. I take forever to get out of the house.

I cook.  I clean up.  I cook.  I clean up.

I wipe mouths and noses and counters and hands and tables and rear ends.

I give baths.  I comb hair that is like silk.  I fix pony tails.  I say “You’re beautiful.”  “You’re smart.” “You’re strong.”  “You’re funny.”

I do laundry.

I help to outfit Super Heros.

Daddy helps them to fly.

 

I do more laundry.

I give lots of hugs.  And kisses.  I snuggle.  I tickle.

Sometimes I just sit.  And watch.  And I’m thankful that I am fortunate enough to be able to do all of these things and so much more.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Song Bird

Posted on by Amy
Last night I had some special girl time with my eldest before bed.  We painted her fingernails.  She chose blue, of course.  While waiting for them to dry we made some funny faces and sang some songs.
My girl loves to sing.  Both of my older girls do, in fact, though Lass is still working on the words a bit…  Miss goes all out in singing her favorites.  She lifts her chin up and belts them out at full volume.  In the car, in the playroom, at the store, on the swingset, wherever.  We were even informed by her teachers that she sings like this at school.  I absolutely love that she does this.  I think it might be a little bit hereditary, because I think I used to sing like that when I was a kid too (okay, I still do).  I remember singing with my mom and my Grandma a lot.  My Mom and I used to rock out to “Barbara Susanne Stripe” (a.k.a. Barbara Streisand), Neil Diamond, and Barry Manilow on 8-track. Or we’d sing all sorts of kid’s songs: You are My Sunshine, Eensy Weensy Spider, Gray Squirrel, Gray Squirrel, and so on.  My Grandma is a very talented musician, and she used to play the piano and teach me lots of old-timey songs.  I think singing is an expression of happiness.  It’s good for the soul.
We sing a lot in our family.  My husband plays the guitar and we sing along with him in the evenings.  The girls and I sing lots of little songs during the day.  We sing while we play, while we are in the car, while we do just about anything.  I’ve had strangers chuckle at me for singing with my girls in the grocery store.  I think it’s usually a nice, friendly chuckle.  I hope.  I’m no vocal sensation, but I can carry a tune.  And who doesn’t love a moving rendition of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star in their grocery’s produce section?
Anyway.  Back to last night.  After Miss and I finished with her nails, while they were drying, she was singing her latest favorite song, “Whistle While You Work.”  I especially love when she sings the songs from Snow White, because she doesn’t just sings the words, she does the vocal trilling “ha-ha-ha-ha-ha…” like Snow White does.  I don’t know if that’s the right term to describe it, but it’s so cute.  And since I can’t really describe it well, I captured it on video.  Though my girl sings loudly and unselfconsciously almost all day long, like most kids her age she was a little less willing to do it on command.  When I first asked her to sing for the camera, she said that she had “run out” of singing.  But then when I told her that I wanted to take a video of her and she could watch it afterwards, well, I could just see the wheels turning as she thought about that. She’s more timid and much quieter than usual in the video.  But I couldn’t help but smile when I watched and listened to her sing her song.

One Wonderful Guy

Posted on by Amy
I’m enjoying having my husband home this week.  We have been relaxing and he’s helping me get as much rest as I can.  Other than the days Miss went to school, he’s been letting me sleep in, which is such a wonderful luxury.  I slept until 9:30 one day!  It was amazing.  He’s been outside with Miss and Lass a lot too, which they love.  They’re working on getting our garden planted.
The girls helped him plant some veggies in these boxes today.
Then he opened the sandbox for them.

Oh, how they enjoyed the sandbox.  This was Lass’s first experience with it.

I must admit, I’m usually not a great lover of the sandbox.  But I think my lack of enthusiasm comes from having Miss in it last year in the middle of summer when she was hot and sweaty and sunscreened and it was nearly impossible to get the sand unstuck from her.  Today, it was no prob. Brushed right off.

Miss found a worm.  She didn’t want anything to do with it.

But Lass thought it was pretty darned cool.

It was a great day for lots of playing outside.

I love looking out the window while cooking dinner and seeing my husband chasing my girls around the backyard, playing “Monster,” or teaching them to kick a ball.  Sometimes I glance up and see them all just lying in the grass chatting and snuggling.  It warms my heart.  He is such a great girl daddy.  He is so thoroughly outnumbered, and I think he loves it.

I’m taking advantage of having my husband home this week and trying to spend some good one on one time with each of my girls.  My older girls have been such troopers through the whole adjustment to having Baby Sis home.  Miss loves to help with her, but I’m trying to give her some special attention all of her own too.

When I first brought Sis home, I was worried that Lass might get lost in the shuffle.  Miss was so interested in Sis and wanted to hold her and help with her all the time, and Sis of course just needs lots of attention and time.  I felt nervous that Lass might get left out.  So I have made a special point of trying to make sure that doesn’t happen.  She’s such a little lover that it hasn’t been hard to get in lots of extra snuggles with her and give her some special time.

I am not going to make the mistake I made with Lass of not introducing her to a bottle until she was five or six weeks old, at which point she flat out refused it, and continued to do so until I gave up trying to get her to take one.  Sis isn’t necessarily loving the bottle yet, but she has done pretty well taking it both from her daddy and from me this week.  I’m trying out a few different bottles to see which one she likes best.  I have just about every type of bottle ever made from my attempts with Lass, so she has lots of choices.

She is such an amazingly easy baby so far.  I’m finding it so easy to just soak up the sweet moments with her.

Unfortunately my sweet littlest one has had a little tendency to scratch the heck out of her face.  Poor baby.

You would think, this being my third time doing this, that I would have mastered the art of cutting newborn fingernails by now.  No.  I suck at it.  I tried three times yesterday to get those suckers trimmed and she was so squirmy I couldn’t get them done.  I know.  I’m a total wuss.  Today I finally wised up and cut them while she was sleeping.  Mission accomplished.  Why didn’t I think of that before?

I’m loving having three precious girls.  And one wonderful guy.