Sisters

The Beginnings of Warm

Posted on by Amy
One week ago, we had this:

Six inches of wet, heavy snow.  Though it was beautiful, it was not really all that welcome.

Today, this is what my front yard looks like.  Hooray.  I’m ready for spring (notice the big sticks still in the ground to mark the driveway when we get lots of snow though…).

It was still pretty cold today, and we still have some snow in our shady backyard, but I think it’s going to warm up this weekend.

I’m not getting my hopes up that spring is here just yet.  It’s not unlikely that we’ll have another snow.  But I am loving the beginnings of warm, with longer days and more sunshine.  I’m hoping that winter will be largely behind us by the time Baby Sis arrives.  These girls are ready to start getting outside again.

The “Bumblebee Hat” 

And I’m a little nervous that I will never get out of the house again once Baby arrives, so I’m thinking that having somewhat warmer weather will at least help in my quest to not be stuck in my house forevermore.

The girls are excited to plant vegetables and flowers in the yard with their Daddy.  I can’t wait to watch them play together outside now that Lass is bigger.  I love this time of year.  So much to look forward to.

38 weeks and Baby Sis is still facing the right direction.  We’re getting so excited to meet her soon!

Sisters With Style

Posted on by Amy

I love how the differences in my girls’ personalities are really starting to shine.  Lass tends to be more laid back, though she is very feisty and can assert herself very effectively when she wants to.  Miss is a bit more demanding in general, though some of that may certainly be her age.  Miss tends to hang back and observe things, where Lass is more likely to jump right in.  Both my girls are very loving, but Lass tends to be my little snuggler.  And so on.  They are both so funny.

Another way I love to watch their differences is in the ways they express themselves through their style.  Big Sister is pretty much happy as long as she is in a “ballerina costume.”  She is nothing if not consistent, and she would wear a leotard and tights all day every day if I would let her.

She loves to have her finger and toenails polished.  Right now they’re blue.  And up until yesterday, her style included a pony tail.  Every. day.  This kind of makes me sad, because I love her hair and would love to do something different with it, but she doesn’t want anything to do with having her hair down or any other way.  Except yesterday and today.  Right now, she’s letting her hair down, and I’m loving it.

When I insist that she wear real clothes, she doesn’t usually have too much of an opinion about what she wears.  Sometimes she’ll insist on a particular pair of socks, which never match the rest of her outfit.  Sometimes she just requests or picks something blue, which is her favorite color right now.  Sometimes she asks to wear a “pretty dress,” mostly just because she likes to wear tights, I think.

And then sometimes this girl shakes it up entirely.  A chef’s hat and heels?  Naturally.  That’s how I cook dinner every night…
Little Sister’s style is a bit more eclectic.  She loves funky shoes.
She doesn’t really love pajamas in general.  Every morning as soon as she wakes up, she says, “Pants?  Shirt?”  The girls doesn’t want to waste any time lounging in jammies, and of course it’s easier to get into her fun shoes without those bulky footie jammies on.  I got her a pair of two-piece jammies to see if that would curb her demands to get dressed immediately upon waking.  It has worked so far.  She loves her jammies with “pants and shirt.”  This morning she donned some fun footwear right away.
These boots have been the favorite of the last few days.

And she also has a fondness for a great “hat.”

Sister style, side by side.

It will be so fun to go shopping for school clothes and prom dresses with these two someday!

I’m Just a Mom

Posted on by Amy

I had an ultrasound and doctor’s appointment today.  Baby Sis is still breech.  At 36 weeks.  This is not news to me.  Or to you, I suspect, since I have mentioned it recently.

If you’ve read here much you’re aware how much I dread the idea of having another c-section.  C-sections suck.  You can read a little bit about my thoughts on and experience with one here if you’re so inclined.  I know not everyone shares my feelings on c-sections.  Some people think they’re no big deal, and that’s fine.  It’s just that a c-section is a big deal to me.  When people here that Sis is breech and that I’m distressed about this and really worried about having another c-section, sometimes they say things like, “Well, just remember that having a healthy baby is the most important thing.”  I think this is a well-meaning comment, but you know what I really want to say when someone says this to me?  “Duh.”

Really.  I don’t need to be reminded that having a healthy baby is the most important thing.  I have thought about that every moment for the last 30-ish weeks, since I knew of little Sis’s existence.  I am very well aware of how lucky I am to have had two beautiful and perfect babies so far.  I know some people are not so fortunate.  I am a Mom. I put my children’s health and wellbeing above my own all the time.  I’m not complaining about this, and I’m not suggesting in any way that this makes me special.  It just makes me a Mom.  Every decision I make, every day, all day, takes into consideration the health and wellbeing of my kids.  That’s just what Moms do.  So yes, I know that having a healthy baby is the most important thing.  Please don’t feel that you need to tell me that.

However, if you say to me (which some people have), “Having a healthy baby is the only thing that really matters, right?”  I will say, definitively, “No.”  As I just said above, having a healthy baby is the very most important thing.  Yes.  But it is not the only thing that matters.  As a Mom, pretty much by definition I put my children before myself in almost all things.  Of course I’m not perfect.  I’m also not a martyr.  I’m just a Mom.  But I’m still an individual being.  I’m a person with feelings and wishes and fears, and I try not to feel guilty about my individual-ness.  I generally don’t feel guilty about the fact that I get a babysitter sometimes and get pedicures or have coffee with a friend and that I love dates with my husband and my book clubs.  I try not to feel guilty about the fact that I sometimes even check my email or surf other websites a little bit when I should probably be playing with my girls.  I try not to feel guilty about this, but you’ll notice I just typed “should.”  Mom-guilt is a powerful thing.  I don’t like it, and I try to stay away from it, but it does creep in from time to time.  And when someone says to me, “Of course having a healthy baby is the only thing that matters, right?,” I feel that Mom-guilt surfacing.  Like what I’m really being told is, “how dare you think about your own desires when going through the majorly huge event of birthing a child?  What kind of mother are you?”

Then I take a deep breath and stop myself from going there.  Some people might judge me because I feel so strongly about not wanting to have another c-section.  I have certainly felt judged at times with respect to this issue both now and when I was in the same situation with Lass and when I chose to have a VBAC with her.  People judge, and that’s okay.  Some people might just make comments like those above for lack of knowing what else to say.  That’s okay too.  At the end of the day, I have carried and nurtured this precious baby girl for eight months so far.  I think it’s natural for me to have a desire to be involved in her emergence into the world, rather than strapped to a table and relegated to the role of observer, which is what a c-section felt like to me.  So if I’m sometimes worried or distressed about Sis’s continued breech-ness, that’s okay.  Please try to refrain from telling me that I shouldn’t think about my own wishes and instead should only think about the health of my baby.  I think about the health of this baby and my two older girls every minute of every day.  Keeping the welfare of my children at the forefront of my mind and having my own feelings, thoughts, desires, opinions, and wishes are not mutually exclusive things.  I’m not less of a Mom for wanting things to work out the way my heart desires.  I’m just a Mom.

And for the record, if it turns out that this baby girl doesn’t flip and I do have to have another c-section, I will not be any less joyful about her birth.  I will cherish her and marvel over her and welcome her into our family with the happiest heart.  And, I will still be sad to have a c-section.  And that’s okay. It will not take away one bit of the celebration of a new, wonderful baby.

And oh, we are very much looking forward to her arrival.  Over the past weekend at one point Miss began handing me all of the baby toys she could find and asking if I thought “Baby Sissy” would like each of them.  She talked about how she would play with her Baby Sissy and how much Baby Sissy would love her and what she would like about each of the toys.  Today, we used face paint crayons to draw a picture for Baby Sissy.

I pointed out to Miss a place on  my belly where you could see Sis moving, and she was amazed.  I told her “Baby Sissy is saying, ‘who’s out there poking me?'” and she got a big kick out of that.  She kept asking, “What else is Baby Sissy saying?”

She colored very intently right where she had seen her sister move.

Notice the concentration of blue just above and to the right of my (kind of disturbingly huge, sorry) belly button.  That’s where Miss could see Sis moving.  It’s also right where her head is.

Happily preparing to welcome home this little one soon.

Weekend Fun

Posted on by Amy
This weekend has been quiet.  It’s very cold here, and my husband had to work this weekend, so the girls and I mostly just stayed home and did lots of fun stay-home stuff.  We had more tea parties, this time with little sister joining in.

 

We played with baby dolls and did some gymnastics in the basement.  We made a little gift to give the other kids at Miss’s school for Valentine’s Day.  Miss and I even completed her first homework assignment from school this afternoon when she didn’t take a nap.  She was given a poster board heart at school and instructed to decorate it with the things she loves for Valentine’s Day.  So today we talked about what she loves.  We taped photos of Lass, Daddy, Mom (I’m now “Mom,” not Mama or Mommy), an ultrasound picture of Sis, and our dog Jonah to the heart.  Then she added photos of herself reading, doing gymnastics, eating ice cream at the pool, and picking a worm out of a carton while fishing with her Daddy.  She added a ballerina sticker, a picture of watermelon, which she said is her favorite food, and interestingly, a picture of her Papa’s tractor.  She was quite decisive about what she wanted and didn’t want, though I had to prompt her a bit by showing pictures and asking her if she wanted certain things.  I loved hearing the things she wanted to add, and was surprised by some things she didn’t care to include, like a picture of her Oopsie Bear Care Bear.  It makes me smile when she surprises me with things like that.

Also this weekend we did some work getting things ready for baby Sis.  I did some crafting during nap time, which I’ll post about when I have some finished projects to show.  Miss helped me fold clothes for Sis, which we transferred from the back of Miss’s closet into Sis’s.

She was so excited to help, and kept singing a little made-up song about the clothes and how her baby sister was going to love them.  She said, “Baby Sissy will be so happy that I helped fold her laundry.  She will love me so much and will give me a big hug.”  I can’t wait to see how wonderful these girls are going to be when their new sister arrives.  Miss was great with Lass, but she’s so much older now, it will be fun to watch how much more she can understand and help with her newest sister.  And I’m happy for Lass to have to chance to make the transition from Baby Sister to Big Sister.

And seriously, there is just something about the relationship these girls have that makes me smile every time I see them playing together and anticipate so happily the addition of another sister.  I love to watch them.  I’ll turn around and randomly see them snuggling together or playing a sweet little private game.

Lass’s language is really exploding, so they can talk to each other much more now, and I love to hear their little conversations.  Miss has a sweet little special voice that she uses for Lass when Lass is upset and Miss is trying to console her.

Usually, though certainly not always, they share pretty well too.  I bought a two-sided easel (which hasn’t been put together yet) so they could both use it at the same time more easily than the easel on their Learning Tower.

But when I witness moments like this one, I wonder why.

This weekend the sisters, as always, played lots of dress up.

Miss wanted to try to take a picture of her sister with my camera, and she did a pretty good job!

Miss also got her fingernails and toenails polished.  She has been very excited about this, and wanted to paint her Daddy’s fingernails when he got home from work today.  He was going to let her do it, until I told him that the only polish remover we have is the super non-toxic stuff that doesn’t really work very well.  He decided to go for a pedicure instead.  Both girls got a chance to paint his toenails.

Miss tried to finish up after Lass polished almost every part of his toes but his nails.

The finished product on the foot that Miss did by herself.

I’m sure this is the first of many nail polishings for this Daddy.  I love that he’s such a good sport about it.

This weekend wasn’t terribly productive.  I only crossed one thing off my extensive to-do list.  The stuff above about getting Sis’s clothes folded and moved into her room is misleading.  I started the project, but since I don’t have her dresser in her room yet or enough hangers for her clothes, I actually got very little done.  I hung some jammies, folded a few swaddle blankets, and moved two boxes, one with newborn cloth diapers and the other with newborn and size 3-month clothes, into Sis’s room.  I got a little bit done on some growth charts I’m making for Lass’s and Sis’s rooms, like the one I made for Miss a while ago.  And that’s about it.  Really though, I don’t care that I didn’t get much done.  When my husband is working the weekend and we are pretty much house-bound, I just do my best to have as much fun as possible and avoid meltdowns, either from my girls or myself.  This weekend, we did a pretty good job.

Quickie

Posted on by Amy
Just returned tonight from another week in the blogging black hole (my parents’ house).  We had a great visit, and I’ll post about that soon.  But tonight I’m tired from a long day in the car and little sleep last night, so here’s a quickie with a few photos from last week.
Miss has gotten into wearing dresses to school.  This is because she likes to wear tights, not because she really cares about dresses.  I don’t have a ton of dresses for her, since she’s never really been into them before, and I tend to think they’re a bit impractical for an active girl.  I didn’t want to spend a ton on new dresses for her, but I found this amazing online consignment store, where I got her three dresses for under $25.  Cute, name brand dresses in great condition.  I love a great deal (have I mentioned that before?).

And somebody got her very own ballet shoes to be like big sister.

Now they dance together.

No words needed for these next three photos.  I’ll just say I love them.

And in closing, Miss’s new thing (besides dresses) is to inspect her feet for toe jam.  It makes me chuckle just to type that.  She almost never finds any.  I do wash regularly between her toes.  But she likes to look for it.  Whatever floats her boat, right?

There.  A quickie.  Night.

Simple

Posted on by Amy
I have a drawer in my kitchen that contains lids for various plastic containers (many of which are no longer anywhere to be found), some swirly straws, and some popsicle molds.  This drawer is located right next to the girls’ Learning Tower, and the other day they discovered it.  Since then it has provided endless entertainment both for them, and for me.  Oh how my girls crack me up.

Miss calls the things in this drawer the stuff for her party.  She alternates between having the items in the drawer be for a dance party and for a tea party. But it’s always a party.

She turns some of the lids into pretend cakes and sings Happy Birthday to each member of the family in sequence.  She pretends to feed various items to Lass, who returns the favor happily.

Sometimes they just marvel at “Mama, everything’s blue!” (or green, or purple, depending on the lid) and then they crack up.

I love the simplicity and innocence of what they find entertaining.  Hilarious even.  They feed off each other and it’s so fun to watch.  You just can’t beat these moments of motherhood.

It’s a Girl!!!

Posted on by Amy
Yesterday, we had our ultrasound and got to see Baby.  We were thrilled to see a healthy little one, growing and developing right on track so far.  We were also able to be able to find out Baby’s gender.  Though I was pretty convinced that this baby was a boy, we were very excited to see that we are having another girl.  Miss and Lass will be having a Sis!  I’m so happy to imagine how wonderful it will be for all my girls to grow up with sisters so close in age.  Though I don’t have a sister, I’ve heard they’re pretty great.  I love that my girls will have each other.  I’m picturing some pretty fabulous tea parties, slumber parties for which we don’t even need to invite any guests, and lots of great girls’ days out.  They can do each other’s hair and share clothes and be each other’s best friends.  I love having girls.
And just in case you’re feeling badly for my husband, swimming in a sea of estrogen and nail polish… Don’t.  He is thrilled to have another girl, if maybe slightly terrified.  One of the first things he said after our ultrasound appointment was something about needing to build a 20-foot wall around our house.  But he loves having girls too. He’s gotten very good at playing Care Bears and dress up.  And our ladies are total Daddy’s girls, especially Lass right now.  
We may or may not someday have a little boy.  Of course we’d love to have a boy, though we would be perfectly happy with all girls too.  And even if we never have a son, I’m quite certain my husband will never feel like he’s missing out on anything.
Our girls love to watch football with him on Saturday mornings, 

though he is not terribly happy with their choice of teams.  So far Miss has expressed her preference for “Go Blue.”

For the record, when I bought these shirts for the girls, I wasn’t in search of Michigan wear.  I was shopping online for a few things for Miss for school and I happened to see these on Old Navy’s website.  I actually did look for Iowa shirts on there too (I’m not entirely sure I would have bought them, but I did look).  No Iowa shirts at Old Navy.

And in case anyone was wondering, when Michigan and Iowa play each other in a few weeks, the girls will be wearing neutral clothing.  Maybe I’ll just dress them in Maize-colored shirts, since both teams share that color.

We try to keep our rivalry all in good fun around here.  But I have to admit I was very excited that Miss burst out singing the Michigan fight song, completely unprovoked, in Target a few weeks ago.

Whichever team our girls choose to root for (it’ll probably end up to be the Badgers anyway…), we still all love to watch football together.  And they love to be outside with their Daddy.

They don’t mind getting dirty or playing a little rough.  Miss loves to try to climb trees.

Yesterday we were taking a look at a house on the water.  Miss went out on the dock with her Daddy, and when he told her it was time to leave she said, “No, I want to fish.  I don’t want to go!”  My hubby will teach them to fish and even to hunt if they are interested.  Miss had her first archery lesson yesterday.

I was really bothered the other day when Miss was looking out the window, watching my hubby shoot his bow.  She said something like, “If I was a boy, I could shoot like Daddy.”

I was quite upset by this statement, and puzzled, because I have never said anything like this to her, nor have I heard anyone else make such a statement to her or in her presence.  So I don’t know where she came up with the idea that she would have to be a boy in order to shoot a bow, or do anything else.


Right away I told Miss that she didn’t have to be a boy to shoot a bow or do anything else, that she could certainly shoot with her Daddy, she just needed to get a little bit bigger.  My husband was so upset when I told him what she’d said, he took her out the next day to shoot with him.  I guess she didn’t need to be bigger, at least to watch and get the sense that she was doing it.

We will always teach all of our girls that they can do or be whatever they want, if they work hard.

And they will learn to do all sorts of fun things with their Dad.

So definitely don’t feel badly for my husband.  A few people have made comments like, “Oh how exciting that you’re having another girl!  But your poor husband!”  Of course, they mean this with all good intentions and kindness.  But, hell no he’s not poor!  To quote a song by Greg Brown: my husband is “a man who’s rich in daughters.”  Yes, we are very rich indeed.

Sidewalk Chalk Paint

Posted on by Amy
Today I got some cheap white pumpkins for the girls to paint.  I had been meaning to make sidewalk chalk paint with my $1 tub of sidewalk chalk from Target for quite a while.  It was a gorgeous day for painting outside, so we took full advantage. 
This was Lass’s first experience with painting.  I knew it would be messy.  I was just hoping to keep her from spilling or eating the paint. 
 
That didn’t work out so well for me.  Oh well.  We made more green paint.  And she didn’t eat much of it…
Miss was really showing her creativity.  Both girls did a great job with their pumpkins.

Lass had as much fun playing with the tub of chalk as with the actual painting.

 But Miss really encouraged her to paint, so they did it together.

And then Lass dumped over my bucket of water and the painting was abandoned for splashing and swirling water.

I love painting outside.  Especially with a 13 month old.  This was a Come-in-the-door-take-clothes-off-immediately-and-put-them-directly-in-laundry-room activity.  And we all had fun doing it.

And if getting messy once today wasn’t enough, well, Lass enjoyed the mac’n’cheese’ for dinner tonight.

Thankfully it was bath night tonight!

Sisters

Posted on by Amy
Every day it is more fun to watch my girls together.

Lass loves to try to imitate Miss.  She gets so excited when she sees her, and sometimes Miss is the only one who can cheer her up.

Miss takes her role seriously, and loves to point things out to Lass and explain them to her.  She calls her “Sweetie” and “Honey” and can be so adorably sweet to her it makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time.

Can’t beat this.  I’m so happy they have each other.

One Year

Posted on by Amy
One year ago, I was arriving at the hospital, in labor with Lass.


I was excited about her impending arrival but scared and nervous at the same time. I had only been in labor with Miss for about four or five hours before I had a c-section, so I had very little experience and naturally I was apprehensive about my plan to have an unmedicated VBAC.


Little did I know how long that night and the next morning would turn out to be. Little did I know that Lass would be 10 and a half pounds of perfect. Little did I know how much joy she would bring to my life and our family. One year ago, when I got to the hospital, ready to get the show on the road and meet our little Lass, I had some idea about the joy part at least. I knew she would be wonderful and we would love her. I knew it would be amazing to have two little girls and a sister for Miss. But that night, one year ago, in my last few (okay, many and agonizing!) hours as a mommy of one little girl, I couldn’t even imagine how much. How wonderful. How big our love. How amazing.

Tonight I’m reflecting on that night, just before Lass came into our lives and made our happy family happier. I’m remembering being a little scared about how Lass’s arrival might affect Miss. I’m smiling at how it did affect her, and at what a fantastic big sister she is. Tonight I’m choking up thinking that my baby will be a year old tomorrow. I’m cringing slightly remembering the pain of getting her here (who the heck says you forget that, by the way?). I’m reminiscing about how great my husband was and what a great team we were that night.
Tomorrow Lass will be one, and I’m all sappy and sentimental thinking about it tonight. It’s amazing the difference one year makes in the life of a family. I remember feeling like Miss grew up practically overnight between the time I put her to bed on this night one year ago and the time she walked into my hospital room to meet her baby sister.
This is Miss, one year ago.


This is her a few weeks ago.


I love to see how much she’s grown.




I mentioned above how it seemed like Miss grew up almost overnight when Lass was born. Today was another day that made her suddenly seem so much more grown up.

Today she went for a visit to her preschool. Preschool. It wasn’t her official first day of school. That will be after Labor Day. Today she just went to check things out and was only there for about an hour and a half. She seemed to be having a blast when I left (she gave me a kiss and ran back to playing with blocks and toy dinosaurs with another little boy) and when I came back (she was happily drawing a picture). Her teacher said she had a little rough patch, but over all did great. When I asked Miss how she liked school she said, “I cwied because my want you.” Stab to the heart. Twist. Gulp. I have to remember how much fun she seemed to be having for the majority of the time she was there. She was very interested in the science area with the birds’ nests, rocks, seeds, and other various objects from nature (she couldn’t stop talking about the birds’ nests and seeds). She got very excited when we talked about trying to find something at the farm next week that she might be able to take to school to add to the collection. She talked about new friends she got to play with. I know she’s going to love school. She’s so confident and inquisitive. It will be great for her to have her own “thing” to do twice a week, without me. Hopefully her first “full day” (three hours) will be a little easier in a couple of weeks.


Lass and I will stay nearby just in case. Today we went two doors down to a bagel shop and met up with the Daddy (who is on nights this week and came from work) for breakfast and coffee. In my last post I mentioned that Lass was feeling under the weather. When she woke up with a fever again on Saturday I took her to the doctor and found out she had strep throat! I suspect she picked it up on the plane home from Florida. She’s been taking her antibiotics and is back to her happy little self now.


My little almost-one-year-old at breakfast with Mommy and Daddy: