Pregnancy

On Being Pregnant

Posted on by Amy
Being pregnant is really an awesome experience.  There’s no real way to explain how cool it is when you feel a little baby kicking in your belly and then get to see pictures of her like this:

Awesome is really the best word to describe it.

Little Sis seems to be growing well so far.  She’s breech for now, just like her big sister Lass was, but I’m hoping she’ll get herself facing the right way more quickly and easily than Lass did.  We’ve entered the third trimester and all is going well.  I’m fairly enormous, but that’s okay.

I’m used to being enormous.  That’s just how I carry a pregnancy I guess.  All way out in front.  It’s not uncommon for me to look more pregnant at 6 months than many other people do when they deliver.  It’s no biggie.  It’s just the way I work.  It is funny though, as wonderful as pregnancy is, it also is an odd experience in terms of how it changes the way people treat you.  Of course there are always the ubiquitous “How have you been feeling?” “How far along are you?” and “Everything is going well, I hope?” questions and comments from friends and strangers alike.  People tend to be concerned with and interested in pregnant women, and this interest is very well-meaning, kind, and harmless.

However, there are times when I swear I must be wearing a sign on my forehead that says, “Hi, I’m Amy.  I’m pregnant.  Feel free to ask me very personal questions about my personal choices and bodily functions, tell me your worst labor and delivery horror stories, comment on how huge or small you think my belly is according to your idea of what size I should be, and/or give me unsolicited advice.  And sure, go ahead and rub my belly while you’re at it.”  Seriously.  Anyone with me here?  Here is just a small sample of some of the things that have been said to me or to others I know:

“Geez!  Did you mean to have them that close together???” – Said to me in a somewhat snide tone by a nurse practitioner after she asked me about my children’s ages during an office visit.

“Oh my gosh!  You gained 10 pounds in a month?!?!  Wow, that’s a lot.” – Said to me by a medical assistant after taking my weight during a routine doctor’s appointment when I was pregnant with Miss (I then heard her whispering to my doctor outside the door about how terrible my weight gain was.  To her credit, my doc never said a word to me about it).

“Wow, my daughter-in-law is at the hospital today delivering twins, and you’re as big as she is!!!” – Said to a friend of mine when she was about 6-7 months pregnant.

“You still have three months to go??  Wow, you look like you’re ready to pop now!” – Said to me this past weekend.

“Are you sure you don’t have gestational diabetes?  I had that, and you look like you do.” – Said to a friend of mine.

“You’d better be planning to breastfeed that baby.” – Said to me by a total stranger in the grocery store when I was pregnant with Miss.

And my personal favorite:
“One on board and another in the oven???  Um, you do know how that happens, right?” – Said to me by a total stranger when I was pregnant with Lass and carrying Miss in a sling above my belly.  I have to say though, this wasn’t as bad as my friend who heard, “You do know how that happens, right?” from an OB/GYN resident doctor while she was in labor with her third child.

And then there’s the belly rubbing.  I hardly ever get belly rubs from people I am close to, but those belly rubs don’t bother me anyway.  It’s the people who are strangers or acquaintances who don’t just rub or pat the belly but kind of, well stroke it, for lack of a better description.  I mean, that’s weird, right?  Fortunately this has only happened to me twice.  Once by a friend of a friend, who started rubbing my belly right after she was introduced to me.  And then another time by an acquaintance who noticed I was pregnant very early on with Sis and started rubbing my relatively small belly as she commented about how exciting it was that I’m pregnant again.  This is not only weird, but risky too, don’t you think?  We hadn’t really announced that we were expecting, and I wasn’t that big yet.  What if I was just gaining weight?  Very risky.  And weird.

Now, I know that for the most part the people who make odd and sometimes inappropriate comments to pregnant women are probably not trying to be offensive.  And usually I’m not even really offended by the comments (except the weight one, that one had me in tears).  I just think they’re kind of funny and like a little puzzling social phenomenon – The “say anything” and “touch freely” policies that often seem to surround a pregnant woman.  I’m not the only person who has experienced this, and I’ve had many laughs with friends about the crazy things people will say to a pregnant woman.  I think people mostly are just interested in pregnancy and want to or feel like they should say something to a pregnant lady to show their interest.  Maybe.  It truly doesn’t matter much anyway, as it’s such a tiny part of the nine-month wonder of pregnancy.  But it does make me chuckle a little.  I love being pregnant.

Giving Thanks

Posted on by Amy
Thanksgiving seems to kind of get a raw deal these days.  Right after Halloween, the Christmas craziness kicks in to full gear in stores, in ads, and so on.  Thanksgiving seems to have been relegated to the position of being nothing more than a signal that it’s time for Black Friday sales to begin.  
Well, I protest.  Thanksgiving may not be as magical and glitzy as Christmas, but it’s a pretty darn cool holiday.  It’s about history, tradition, family, and of course, being thankful for what we have.  And I am oh so thankful.

How in the world could I be anything but thankful every day?  I have a wonderful husband who is an awesome father to our girls. I have two beautiful and healthy daughters.  I am more than halfway through a third healthy pregnancy.  I am so fortunate to have been able to conceive and carry two healthy children and to have a third baby girl on the way.  Even though this is my third pregnancy, I still marvel at the wonders of growing a little person in my belly.  Every time she kicks or wiggles, I can’t help but put my hand on my stomach and smile.  It never gets old.  Never.  And I am so thankful.  

I’m thankful that my girls have each other and love each other so much.

I’m thankful that my husband works hard every day, and has worked hard for a very long time, so that we are in a position where I am able to stay home with our girls.  It’s the best job in the world and I am so lucky to do it full time.

I’m thankful for so much more.  But today, after spending the day with my husband and our girls, eating food that someone else cooked, watching football, and just enjoying each other, I am so full of gratitude for this.  For my family.  For our home.  For my soul mate.  For these beautiful little souls and their baby sister.

Happy Thanksgiving.

It’s a Girl!!!

Posted on by Amy
Yesterday, we had our ultrasound and got to see Baby.  We were thrilled to see a healthy little one, growing and developing right on track so far.  We were also able to be able to find out Baby’s gender.  Though I was pretty convinced that this baby was a boy, we were very excited to see that we are having another girl.  Miss and Lass will be having a Sis!  I’m so happy to imagine how wonderful it will be for all my girls to grow up with sisters so close in age.  Though I don’t have a sister, I’ve heard they’re pretty great.  I love that my girls will have each other.  I’m picturing some pretty fabulous tea parties, slumber parties for which we don’t even need to invite any guests, and lots of great girls’ days out.  They can do each other’s hair and share clothes and be each other’s best friends.  I love having girls.
And just in case you’re feeling badly for my husband, swimming in a sea of estrogen and nail polish… Don’t.  He is thrilled to have another girl, if maybe slightly terrified.  One of the first things he said after our ultrasound appointment was something about needing to build a 20-foot wall around our house.  But he loves having girls too. He’s gotten very good at playing Care Bears and dress up.  And our ladies are total Daddy’s girls, especially Lass right now.  
We may or may not someday have a little boy.  Of course we’d love to have a boy, though we would be perfectly happy with all girls too.  And even if we never have a son, I’m quite certain my husband will never feel like he’s missing out on anything.
Our girls love to watch football with him on Saturday mornings, 

though he is not terribly happy with their choice of teams.  So far Miss has expressed her preference for “Go Blue.”

For the record, when I bought these shirts for the girls, I wasn’t in search of Michigan wear.  I was shopping online for a few things for Miss for school and I happened to see these on Old Navy’s website.  I actually did look for Iowa shirts on there too (I’m not entirely sure I would have bought them, but I did look).  No Iowa shirts at Old Navy.

And in case anyone was wondering, when Michigan and Iowa play each other in a few weeks, the girls will be wearing neutral clothing.  Maybe I’ll just dress them in Maize-colored shirts, since both teams share that color.

We try to keep our rivalry all in good fun around here.  But I have to admit I was very excited that Miss burst out singing the Michigan fight song, completely unprovoked, in Target a few weeks ago.

Whichever team our girls choose to root for (it’ll probably end up to be the Badgers anyway…), we still all love to watch football together.  And they love to be outside with their Daddy.

They don’t mind getting dirty or playing a little rough.  Miss loves to try to climb trees.

Yesterday we were taking a look at a house on the water.  Miss went out on the dock with her Daddy, and when he told her it was time to leave she said, “No, I want to fish.  I don’t want to go!”  My hubby will teach them to fish and even to hunt if they are interested.  Miss had her first archery lesson yesterday.

I was really bothered the other day when Miss was looking out the window, watching my hubby shoot his bow.  She said something like, “If I was a boy, I could shoot like Daddy.”

I was quite upset by this statement, and puzzled, because I have never said anything like this to her, nor have I heard anyone else make such a statement to her or in her presence.  So I don’t know where she came up with the idea that she would have to be a boy in order to shoot a bow, or do anything else.


Right away I told Miss that she didn’t have to be a boy to shoot a bow or do anything else, that she could certainly shoot with her Daddy, she just needed to get a little bit bigger.  My husband was so upset when I told him what she’d said, he took her out the next day to shoot with him.  I guess she didn’t need to be bigger, at least to watch and get the sense that she was doing it.

We will always teach all of our girls that they can do or be whatever they want, if they work hard.

And they will learn to do all sorts of fun things with their Dad.

So definitely don’t feel badly for my husband.  A few people have made comments like, “Oh how exciting that you’re having another girl!  But your poor husband!”  Of course, they mean this with all good intentions and kindness.  But, hell no he’s not poor!  To quote a song by Greg Brown: my husband is “a man who’s rich in daughters.”  Yes, we are very rich indeed.

The Well-Dressed Belly

Posted on by Amy
This is what Miss wore to school yesterday.

Adorable, yes?

Why is it that I can find such wonderful clothes for my children, and yet it is so difficult to find simply practical, comfortable, and attractive maternity clothing for myself?  Set aside the fact that I spend much more time and am much more interested in finding fabulous things for my kids.  That’s a given.  But, I should still be able to find decent stuff to help me look nice through the 6-ish months of my pregnancy when I can’t fit into my regular clothes anymore.  Right?

Now I will concede that I have found some nice casual and everyday work clothes for this pregnancy.  I refused to spend much money on maternity clothes when I was pregnant with Miss, which resulted in me buying mostly junk that is no longer wearable this time around, and the clothes I have from my pregnancy with Lass are mostly not appropriate because of different seasons.  So, I had to buy some new maternity clothes recently.  Plus, with this being my third pregnancy in three years, I really was just sick of looking dumpy.  This time I invested in a few nice new items, and some great jewelry (check out this Etsy shop), so that I will be a little more comfortable and stylish for the next 5-6 months.

Unfortunately, I have never needed, and have not wanted to invest in a maternity business suit, so when I got the call two days ago that I needed to appear in court to provide expert witness testimony today, I had nothing to wear!  I went to every maternity store nearby and several department stores with pitifully small maternity sections.  I couldn’t find a suit, though I’m not sure I really expected to.  I would have settled for a nice blazer that I could wear with the black maternity pants I already have.  But no.  I found one jacket that was horridly ugly and much too short to wear over any other maternity shirt without it hanging out the bottom (and one can’t exactly tuck a shirt in to maternity pants).  I didn’t have time to find and order anything online.  I was frantically searching the stores for other nice business attire and was shocked to find how casual most of the “business” maternity clothing out there is.  Now, I suppose for many work situations, the things I saw would be fine.  But surely there are pregnant women out there who have to wear a business suit or at least a jacket to work on a regular basis.  Right?  Where are these elusive suits?  Why is a maternity blazer so horrid-looking?  These are the questions I was asking myself as I walked into court this morning wearing my black pants, a button up shirt I purchased when pregnant with Miss (couldn’t even find a nice one of these in the past two days!), and a black cardigan sweater that sort of, very loosely, approximated a business-jacket-type look.  I felt woefully underdressed.

Fortunately, my testimony went well.  I’m sure no one else was nearly as concerned about my lack of a suit as I was.  And most importantly, my girls looked adorable today.

Turn, Turn, Turn

Posted on by Amy
I had a regular prenatal appointment yesterday. Baby Girl is breech. This is not good news. As I type this I am on knees and elbows, because I’ve heard that spending time in this position can help a breech baby to flip. I don’t know if that’s true, but it can’t hurt, right? Well, except that it does kind of. It’s really not the most comfortable position, and I may end up with permanent carpet indentations on my knees and elbows. If she turns it’s all worth it though.
Funny thing? Having Baby Girl be breech has been a big fear for me during this pregnancy. This is not ha-ha funny, but funny in an ironic, crappy kind of way. Why? Because I had to have a c-section with Miss. It was not planned that way. My big fabulous plan was to have an all natural, medication-free birth. She was head-down, ready to go. I went into labor on my own. Things were progressing. But then her heart rate went way up, she was showing late decelerations, and she passed meconium. None of which are very good signs, so my doc recommended a c-section and my husband and I agreed.
Miss was born perfect and healthy, so I have much to be thankful for. But I can still say that c-sections really suck. I did not want to have pain medication, yet there I was, completely numb, probably from about my armpits down. I really wanted to hold my daughter immediately after her birth, but my arms were strapped down, I was shaking uncontrollably, and the anesthesiologist was stressing and hovering around my head because my blood pressure got really low. It was almost two hours after she was born I think before I finally got to hold her. And that’s all without even mentioning the crappy recovery from surgery.
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mean to sound like I’m complaining. I have a beautiful, healthy, perfect daughter, and I could not justify risking that in order to have the birth experience that I had “planned” for. That said, I really, really do not want another c-section. I have been talking with my doctor about having a VBAC with any pregnancies after Miss pretty much since the minute she told me I should have a section. Seriously, in the same breath that she was recommending a section for Miss’s delivery, she was telling me that I would be a good candidate for VBAC with future pregnancies. She knew how much I didn’t want a c-section. We also discussed this at my 6 week post-partum checkup and started talking about it from appointment #1 with this pregnancy. My doctor has been very supportive of this option.
Of course, it’s only an option if certain criteria are met. 1) I either have to go into labor on my own before 41 weeks (the max she will allow me to remain pregnant) or 2)be dilated enough that she can break my water to induce labor, since it’s not a good idea to use medications to induce labor for a VBAC (using small amounts of pitocin to augment labor is okay, I guess, but the amount needed to induce labor is not okay). 3) I can’t have pre-eclampsia. And, oh yeah, 4) the baby has to be head-down!!!!
So, here I am on knees and elbows, sending major head-down vibes to this little girl. I know there is still time for her to flip, and I’m hopeful. I’m only about 34 weeks now. It can happen. I will have another ultrasound at my next appointment at 36 weeks. If Baby Girl is still breech I will discuss the possibility of doing an external version with my doc (having her manually turn the baby by pressing on my belly). I didn’t see my doc at yesterday’s appointment so I’m not sure how she will feel about doing that. There are risks, of course, so I’m not sure either. For right now I’m willing this baby to get herself facing the right direction. I’d appreciate any good baby-flipping vibes you all would be willing to send my way too, or any other suggestions on how to get her to flip.
And just in case this post has seemed like a big downer (not intentional, but probably the case), I’ll leave you with something fun from today. First of all, Miss is really enjoying this whole “Mommy-on-her-knees-and-elbows” thing, as it allows her to use me as a jungle gym. Second, check out how grown up she looks eating a peach all by herself. Simple pleasures 🙂